"My existential conundrum"

Have you ever pondered on the fact that, the world where you live in, exists just because of you. 

You are the one who sees it, experiences it, deals with it. A big part of your reality is people and their perception. What people are saying or thinking or doing are merely coming to your consciousness, nothing else! Others thoughts, others opinions, others feelings are actually your imagination. You are creating all these things in your mind. When you go on dream mode a whole new world appears and during deep sleep everything vanishes. Only silence, dark deep emptiness, an eternal peace. No people, no existence of life, no object, only blankness. 

Watch your thoughts, try to read your mind, listen to your beating hurt. Everything you can possibly feel or see is coming from you, deep inside and that the reality. 

This universe is not really under any obligation to make any sense to any one of us! Everything is just illusion! You me others!!! Everything! Still they feel so real. They appear as if they are permanent. They feel like a part of us; whereas in reality, even reality doesn’t exist or never will. At the end of the day, we are gonna sleep on the lap of eternity or wake up from an eternal sleep. I am afraid, how will I encounter that void someday.

Sometime, I feel, I don't understand myself what I think and how I feel! I am constantly in a conflict between real and unreal yet my quest is ongoing. But, in the process I am feeling so many things which I can't articulate at all; because, the words will fall short but still those emotions will be left unexpressed. 

-The retard philosopher :):